The Power of Reciprocity: How Helping Others Strengthens Your Network

I was out with a group of girlfriends one night when one of them realized — mid-conversation, mid-laugh — that she had something stuck in her teeth.

We made our way to the bathroom, where she rummaged through her purse.

“No floss,” she said, clearly annoyed.

Before we could even respond, a woman nearby overheard and lit up.

“Oh! I know someone who has some!”

She disappeared for a moment and came back with a travel dispenser of floss — like some kind of hygiene superhero.

Crisis averted. Night saved.

We laughed, said thank you, and went on with our evening.

Fast forward a few months. I’m at a conference, heading into a session, when a woman walking beside me says: “You probably won’t remember this, but we met a while ago because your friend needed floss.”

I didn’t even let her finish.

“Of course I remember!” I said. “The floss angel who saved the day!”

We started talking. Turns out, she’s a registered nurse who does freelance writing for publications that need medical expertise. We connected, exchanged info — and when I got back to my office, I e-introduced her to an editor I sometimes write for.

Not because I was asked to, or because I had to. Because I wanted to.

"You don’t need to be the most outgoing person in the room. You just need to show up with value."

— Jaime Mann, EO Winnipeg

That’s reciprocity in action.

In psychological terms, the ‘rule of reciprocation’ refers to the universal tendency for humans to feel compelled to reciprocate when given floss a gift. Humans are wired with the impulse to give back when somebody has been generous with us.

And it is one of the most powerful — and most ignored — drivers of effective networking.

Speaking of Networking

. . . Ewwwww, right?

Many of us hear the word “networking” and want to run the other way. Some common complaints:

• “It is manipulative.”
• “I am an introvert — I can’t network.”
• “I know I should do it for business, but it just feels … so cringy.” 

The Shift That Changes Everything

We are getting it all wrong. Effective networking is not about handing out business cards, being the most outgoing person in the group, or working the room like a salesperson at the end of a tight quarter. It is not about collecting contacts. (In fact, this is the type of “networking” that inevitably elicits groaning from the teams and leaders that I work with.)

Real networking isn’t about “What can I get?”

Instead, focus on “How can I help?”

This shift in perspective makes all the difference.

Because when you genuinely help someone, you establish trust immediately. You move from being somebody they met to somebody they remember.

Why Should I Care About Networking Anyway?

For entrepreneurs specifically, effective networking not only connects you with potential customers, it nurtures your growth and learning, organically puts you in touch with financial backers and future collaborators, and puts a face behind your company (which, let’s be honest, is a necessity these days.)

And if that doesn’t sway you, how about the positive impact social connection has for your well-being?

• 70% of professionals say networking supports their sense of well-being (LinkedIn, 2021)
• Social support is consistently linked to lower stress, anxiety, and depression (American Psychological Association, 2019)
• Strong social connections are linked to improved health and reduced rates of early death (WHO, 2025)

I can almost hear you saying, “But Jaime, I’m super busy! I don’t have time to make a bunch of new friends. I barely have enough time to keep the ones I have.”

I have good news: You don’t need to maintain hundreds of deep relationships for this to have a positive benefit. A large-scale LinkedIn study of over 20 million users found that weak ties — people you don’t know especially well — are some of the most valuable connections when it comes to new opportunities.

"Real networking isn’t about “What can I get?” Instead, focus on “How can I help?” That shift in perspective makes all the difference."

 — Jaime Mann, EO Winnipeg

So, don’t fret! You won’t need to add a bunch of new people to your birthday party invitation list in order to build your network in a meaningful way. You just need to build positive, memorable interactions with other humans.

5 Ways to Use Reciprocity to Strengthen Your Network

1. Ditch “What can you do for me?” Lean into “How can I help this person?”

Offering value to another person is way easier than you think. You can always offer another person your undivided attention and genuine interest during a conversation. That is meaningful — especially today, where we rarely get anybody’s undivided attention! Don’t stress if you don’t immediately have something tangible to share, like an introduction to another person in their industry.

2. Make Meaningful Introductions

Of course, this must be said. Consider who you know and ask yourself, “How can I enable connections between people who would benefit from knowing each other?”

3. Follow Up Like a Human Being (Not a Robot)

Send a message that references something real — something you talked about, laughed about, or learned. Avoid generic, “It was nice to meet you” messages if possible.

4. Visibility Matters

You don’t need to be everywhere. But staying top of mind — through thoughtful engagement or shared insights — keeps the connection alive. Did you come across an interesting podcast that talks about something this person brought up in your previous conversation? Send a link with “Hey this podcast made me think of you — you might find it interesting. Remember when we chatted about that new tech? This company is unreal!”

5. Be a Talk Show Host

Consider what a good talk show host does: They are curious, present, interested and listen exceptionally well. (The really good ones come across as honest, not overly polished.) They ask thoughtful questions, give genuine compliments, and essentially make their guests feel important and appreciated. 

These are exactly the same things we can do when we meet people. You don’t have to be a charismatic extrovert; just show the people you are speaking to that they matter. And, I can’t stress this enough: If you’re trying to look interested, but mentally creating a grocery list, people will be able to tell. Even if you have no idea what you might have in common with a person, remind yourself that there is always something interesting to learn, and ask a few genuine questions to get a conversation going.

A Final Thought

You don’t need to be the most connected person in the room, and you don’t need to be the most outgoing.

You just need to be someone who shows up with value. Because people remember how you made their life easier, and how you showed up.

So, the next time you’re networking, don’t overthink it.

Just ask yourself: “How can I help?”

(And when in doubt? Be the person who shows up with the floss.)

Contributed by Jaime Mann, an EO Winnipeg Member and partner in Econo Wall and Ceilings. She is a professional keynote speaker and psychology expert who helps leaders strengthen their self-leadership so they can lead others with clarity, courage, and connection. With a background in psychology and over two decades of leadership experience in high-pressure environments, Jaime brings research-backed insights and real-world perspective to the challenges leaders face today. Learn more at www.jaimemann.com

Related posts of interest:  

• How to Network Like a CEO: Secrets to Expand Your Influence
• Why Most Employee Feedback Fails--and How to Fix It
• Overcoming Imposter Syndrome as a Leader
• Networking Isn’t Dead but Most Entrepreneurs Are Doing It Wrong
• How to Turn Connections Into Strategic Partnerships That Scale